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Presentation is Everything

Presentation. It is literally everything in life. What makes you want to buy a burger at a restaurant? Other than the fact that burgers are AHMAZING, it could be because of that giant picture they posted in the menu with the meaty cheese and colorful veggies. Why might you risk the extra calories to get that huge piece of chocolate cake? Maybe because it is shown with swirls of chocolate and whip cream. Why do we want fancy cars? Cause they look fancy and rich!! And there’s nothing wrong with wanting something that looks nice or is well presented. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to present yourself in a nice way either. But what you might not realize, is that presentation is everything. Whether or not that burger actually looks like the picture once you get it, it attracted you. Whether or not that cake was super dry and flavorless doesn’t mean you didn’t look at that picture and want it. Just because you portray yourself a certain way, doesn’t mean that is necessarily exactly who you are. Which is why you need to make sure you’re presenting yourself in a way that truly represents who you are.

Business presentation. I think people these days forget about how important it is for you to present yourself in a professional manner…if you’re going into a professional position. I want tattoos. I want piercings, but I don’t always get them where I want to because I know that going into the legal field they might not want someone with all kinds of tattoos. I know it is 2017, and I would like to think that we are past these sort of things being a real issues, but I also don’t want to jeopardize any chance I have getting my dream job. I see so many people these days that don’t think about that. Young kids getting tattoos all over their bodies. Getting all kinds of facial piercings and they have no idea what they might be doing to their future. Also social media…if you are constantly posting videos of you drunk or smoking or out at clubs constantly, that might not be a good look. Despite what your privacy settings are and despite you “not being friends with” your employer, there are ways! Trust me..I have lived them. I have been targeted and had my social media used against me. But I have also been reckless and posted things I shouldn’t have and paid for it. So take my advice- present yourself as someone an employer would be proud of.

Personal presentation. To me the most important presentation is of yourself. How do you present yourself online? How do you present yourself to co workers? How do you present yourself to the world? I’m not saying worry about what everyone thinks of you, but perhaps keep it in the back of your mind. Not in a sense that people need to understand you or that all of their opinions are of the utmost importance, but how they see you can definitely affect your future! You might not get a job because of how you presented yourself at the interview. You might not date the guy you wanted to date because of how you portrayed yourself on the first date. Maybe the guy who always liked you changed his mind when he saw how you acted on Snapchat. Maybe you lose your job because of something you said on Twitter. That might sound silly, but I’ve seen it happen. I have seen girls complain about the men that they date and how they treat them like crap and I just want to scream “IT’S NOT JUST THEM IT’S YOU!!!” Think about it. If you present yourself as a very sexual object, that is the type of man you are going to attract. Men with class and respect aren’t going to want to waste their time with you. I say this because I know this from experience.

I struggled with feeling ugly my entire life until one day I went to college and woke up and it was like whoa why are men paying attention to me!? I was very innocent….like VERY. And I was also too trusting and pretty naive…aka dumb! I started getting the attention I had always wanted. So I started to feed into it. I slowly but surely pushed my boundaries until there weren’t any anymore. I wouldn’t say I walked around campus with a shirt on that said “give me the D,” but I found out later that i definitely had a reputation. And being at a Christian college, that made the reputation 10 times worse. Girls were coming to me saying they heard I’d slept with all these guys that I’d never even been with! Anyways…I played into any attention I could get. I will be the first one to say that I was easy at the time. I was desperate for the attention I felt like I never got and I wanted to soak it all up. I wanted to feel wanted. However, due to the fact that Ipresented myself as convenient, I was NEVER the only girl. Not once…not until the official start of my current relationship. And everything I put myself through has messed me up for years. I am paying for the damage those guys caused me, but I know that it is also on me. I let them use me. I’d say I even wanted to be used…until I didn’t. But at that point it was almost too late. I had a reputation. The damage was done. The guys on campus never saw me as girlfriend material and my real hope of finding a boyfriend was crush.

During those years, some of my extended family took it upon themselves to get in contact with me and my family. They would send me emails in which they essentially called me a whore or promiscuous. My uncle actually toldl me that I looked like a prostitute on Facebook. Now…they were completely in the wrong for saying that and I didn’t agree AT ALL. But that just goes to show just how serious how you present yourself can be. I didn’t think I posted anything wrong on Facebook, but they literally showed me pictures of mine and told me their interpretation. I knew my motives behind the innocent selfies and the pictures with my girlfriends. I knew that yes, I was struggling with handling the relationships I had. And it hurt, but it didn’t affect my life. They’re no longer a part of my life and that’s on them. I didn’t change how I presented myself on social media, it just opened my eyes to just how open to interpretation things you post online can be! It was shocking to say the least. But due to my experience with men, I know I hadn’t known my worth and I wasn’t presenting myself as the great girl I knew deep down that i was.

Presentation is everything. I’ve almost lost jobs due to what i’ve posted online. I’ve been called slutty for posting pictures with cleavage showing. I was the “other woman” more times than not because I didn’t show I was worth anything. I hold responsibility for all these things, but that doesn’t meant what everyone else has said and done has been right either. The bottom line is, if I had believed in myself and been confident in who I was, I would have naturally presented myself that way. I think things would have been a lot different for me if I had presented myself differently. And I think that things could be different for you if you take a step back and ask yourself: how do I present myself? Am I constantly negative? Do I come across as unapproachable? Do I seem desperate? Am I showing myself as someone who deserves all the best in life? Or am I settling and allowing myself to be used cause I don’t think I can do better? Presentation is everything…so present yourself like the king or queen that you are go out there and kill it!

Xoxo,

Mo

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Trust Issues

I’ve had this blog active for less than week. I’ve posted two things in here and it’s already happening. One of my biggest fears of creating this blog was that someone(s) would take what I said in my most vulnerable state and throw it back into my face. It’s been 4 days (depending on when this gets posted it may be more) and someone has already used my exact worlds against me. Awesome.

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